Two weeks left of school. Spent the last 4 days wasting time and spending the whole night out. I'm equally excited and depressed to be going home. I think I'm very much ready though. I'm ready for something new -- even if it is going home, it is something different. I like change.
I've been neglecting you, Blog. This is only my second post this month. No worries though, I can promise a lot more for May. I think I lost touch with my spiritual side lately. And by that I mean creatively not religiously. It's hard to drive straight in the rain, though.
I'm setting high expectations for myself this summer. I want to do things. I want to feel alive again. I've lost that momentarily. Although I think I can blame that on the alcohol...
Showing posts with label College. Show all posts
Showing posts with label College. Show all posts
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Quick Notes
I feel like this entire month has been such a whirlwind. Even going on vacation I never really relaxed.
Anyway some quick notes.
Fashion show is in 3 weeks. Almost ready for it.
Never put off what you are capable of doing now. I know I've heard that somewhere before. Whoever said it is right.
I think all libraries should be beautiful. It's the one thing my university is really missing. And it depresses the hell out of me. Oh well, there's always this beauty in Vienna I should go visit.
Anyway some quick notes.
Fashion show is in 3 weeks. Almost ready for it.
Never put off what you are capable of doing now. I know I've heard that somewhere before. Whoever said it is right.
I think all libraries should be beautiful. It's the one thing my university is really missing. And it depresses the hell out of me. Oh well, there's always this beauty in Vienna I should go visit.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
I Must Become a Lion Heart Again
Can't stop listening: Florence and the Machine. Postcards from Italy, You've Got the Love the XX, Rabbit Heart. It's happy music mostly. Good for the soul, I think.
Hey, Note to Self:
Never refer to your ethnic designated driver "Sanjaya" because you don't know whats going on and you just follow the other plastered passenger's lead -- you will feel like an asshole in the morning. People have names. Ask them.
1:28am. Still not in bed. Looks like I'm gonna take a nap after Drawing and before Art History. :]
Photo from "Rabbit Heart".
Hey, Note to Self:
Never refer to your ethnic designated driver "Sanjaya" because you don't know whats going on and you just follow the other plastered passenger's lead -- you will feel like an asshole in the morning. People have names. Ask them.
1:28am. Still not in bed. Looks like I'm gonna take a nap after Drawing and before Art History. :]
Photo from "Rabbit Heart".
Monday, January 18, 2010
Cold Nights, Snow Fights, Drunken Heights
Tonight I finished my first drawing for my class. I felt surprisingly confident with the end result. Although not completely satisfied with the overall layout and composition, it felt good to be closer to better line quality and clarity.
The snow is melting today and it's kind of sad. I miss my blanketed earth with the marks of animals scampering around on the ground. I miss watching my hot breath leave my lungs and seep into the black night.
Had a great weekend with 3 of the greatest friends I've ever had. We laughed so hard we cried. We drank so much we passed out on strangers beds. It was a beautiful thing coming back to my room at 2am and seeing all of them squished onto my futon, passed out under the soft, chinese lantern lights. One I met before my memory begins. One I met on the best night of my life. One was the tiny hello in the large hall. My girls. I know our paths may never come together for such a weekend again, but while it lasted, it was such a beautiful thing.
Laundry and reading tonight, library and drawing tomorrow.
It's so good to get back to the life I missed.
The snow is melting today and it's kind of sad. I miss my blanketed earth with the marks of animals scampering around on the ground. I miss watching my hot breath leave my lungs and seep into the black night.
Had a great weekend with 3 of the greatest friends I've ever had. We laughed so hard we cried. We drank so much we passed out on strangers beds. It was a beautiful thing coming back to my room at 2am and seeing all of them squished onto my futon, passed out under the soft, chinese lantern lights. One I met before my memory begins. One I met on the best night of my life. One was the tiny hello in the large hall. My girls. I know our paths may never come together for such a weekend again, but while it lasted, it was such a beautiful thing.
Laundry and reading tonight, library and drawing tomorrow.
It's so good to get back to the life I missed.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Don't Quit
Don't quit when the tide is lowest,
For it is just about to turn
Don't quit over doubts and questions,
For there's something you may learn.
Don't quit when the night is darkest,
For it's just a while 'til dawn.
Don't quit when you've run the farthest,
For the race is almost won.
Don't quit when the hill is steepest,
For your goal is almost nigh.
Don't quit for you're not a failure until you fail to try.
From a poet, to a kindergartner, to me, to you.
Art classes start Tuesday. My work-outs start tomorrow.
Photo cred.
For it is just about to turn
Don't quit over doubts and questions,
For there's something you may learn.
Don't quit when the night is darkest,
For it's just a while 'til dawn.
Don't quit when you've run the farthest,
For the race is almost won.
Don't quit when the hill is steepest,
For your goal is almost nigh.
Don't quit for you're not a failure until you fail to try.
From a poet, to a kindergartner, to me, to you.
Art classes start Tuesday. My work-outs start tomorrow.
Photo cred.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Je Vais Bien; Ne T'en Fais Pas
Last day here before Thanksgiving break. Thank the Lord. Never thought I would be homesick, but here I am, sick as a dog. Oh, and dying to go shopping.
I keep meaning to upload photos of my outfits, as that seems to be what people want in a fashion blog these days. (I love how I say these days even though fashion blogging is relatively new. Niceee haha.)
I've got a ton of dirty laundry and seriously hardly a thing to wear home in the morning. Might as well wear my leotard straight home from ballet.
Ugh. Ballet at 7:30... a mere 6 hours from now. I guess I forgot people are actually suppose to sleep at night. Oh well, I mean I probably would have been lying awake right now even if I had try to go to sleep.
Insomnia hits me like a bitch slap.
As far as news goes, turns out I'm not studying abroad for at least one more year. Getting an apartment instead. Cannot wait to have a home of my own finally! There will surely be pics. I'm determined to make my future home a freakin piece of art itself.
Photo cred.
I keep meaning to upload photos of my outfits, as that seems to be what people want in a fashion blog these days. (I love how I say these days even though fashion blogging is relatively new. Niceee haha.)
I've got a ton of dirty laundry and seriously hardly a thing to wear home in the morning. Might as well wear my leotard straight home from ballet.
Ugh. Ballet at 7:30... a mere 6 hours from now. I guess I forgot people are actually suppose to sleep at night. Oh well, I mean I probably would have been lying awake right now even if I had try to go to sleep.
Insomnia hits me like a bitch slap.
As far as news goes, turns out I'm not studying abroad for at least one more year. Getting an apartment instead. Cannot wait to have a home of my own finally! There will surely be pics. I'm determined to make my future home a freakin piece of art itself.
Photo cred.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Compliments and Candy
It always starts with an excitement.
It ends with a long walk home, this time solo.
I asked him to walk me home, be a gentleman, you know. He said he was too drunk. Part of me believed him, as his eyes told that. Part of me identified his slick laziness and chauvinistic pig ways. Either way I was fine with it and decided it was for the best, as I don't think I really wanted him to end up at my place either, although it would have been entertaining to see the look on the face of my oh so distant roommate.
"You have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen." Not the first time I've been told this, hopefully won't be the last. The key to this was deciphering the sincerity of the remark. We had moved from the benches of the dance floor with the cheesy colored lights and distractingly loud music to the executive room with high-backed, quality foam seated swirling chairs. Legs spread, back against the wall, he held me at his waist, high off the ground as he was tall like me. He continued with the compliments, but the neediness in his voice was starting to annoy me. He smelled good and told me I was beautiful, and he was certainly more than relatively attractive, so I let him continue. We didn't sleep together, God no. He had sweet talked way too many girls like this before me, and I was well aware. To my Charismatic Wonderboy, I knew your game the whole time. Really any guy who ever wants a guarantee lay should take lessons from this guy. He could tell most girls the world was going to end and I'm sure they all would believe it, not to mention what they'd do for him before this "end of the world". But then again, most girls who end up at these frats really are that ridiculous. I like to think of myself as an exception thank you very much.
He wanted me to go away with him for a 2 day trip to Michigan. Fucking glorious. This kid had so much bull shit spewing out of his mouth I wouldn't be surprised if it was coming out his ass too. Sure, he might have wanted me to come, but no way in Hell was I really going. I didn't graduate high school with my 4.1 GPA by blowing my teachers.
Here I am, eating Munchies and drinking my Minute Maid Lemonade out of the 2-liter, something that really disgusts me. But I live alone and never have anyone to share my lemonade with so what the hell. My frustration is solely derived from the fact that I left my phone there somewhere. Everything would have been fine if I hadn't left my phone at that goddamn frat. FML.
Onward college life, Onward.
It ends with a long walk home, this time solo.
I asked him to walk me home, be a gentleman, you know. He said he was too drunk. Part of me believed him, as his eyes told that. Part of me identified his slick laziness and chauvinistic pig ways. Either way I was fine with it and decided it was for the best, as I don't think I really wanted him to end up at my place either, although it would have been entertaining to see the look on the face of my oh so distant roommate.
"You have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen." Not the first time I've been told this, hopefully won't be the last. The key to this was deciphering the sincerity of the remark. We had moved from the benches of the dance floor with the cheesy colored lights and distractingly loud music to the executive room with high-backed, quality foam seated swirling chairs. Legs spread, back against the wall, he held me at his waist, high off the ground as he was tall like me. He continued with the compliments, but the neediness in his voice was starting to annoy me. He smelled good and told me I was beautiful, and he was certainly more than relatively attractive, so I let him continue. We didn't sleep together, God no. He had sweet talked way too many girls like this before me, and I was well aware. To my Charismatic Wonderboy, I knew your game the whole time. Really any guy who ever wants a guarantee lay should take lessons from this guy. He could tell most girls the world was going to end and I'm sure they all would believe it, not to mention what they'd do for him before this "end of the world". But then again, most girls who end up at these frats really are that ridiculous. I like to think of myself as an exception thank you very much.
He wanted me to go away with him for a 2 day trip to Michigan. Fucking glorious. This kid had so much bull shit spewing out of his mouth I wouldn't be surprised if it was coming out his ass too. Sure, he might have wanted me to come, but no way in Hell was I really going. I didn't graduate high school with my 4.1 GPA by blowing my teachers.
Here I am, eating Munchies and drinking my Minute Maid Lemonade out of the 2-liter, something that really disgusts me. But I live alone and never have anyone to share my lemonade with so what the hell. My frustration is solely derived from the fact that I left my phone there somewhere. Everything would have been fine if I hadn't left my phone at that goddamn frat. FML.
Onward college life, Onward.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
"You Don't Need To Look At The Floor"
Standing tall, surely unsure.
Captivated by the melody and accompanied by the memory.
"You don't need to look at the floor."
With my traveler's lid.
With my dirty boots.
With the chill of the air.
Still unsure.
Confidently insecure.
Wondering if the turning of the leaves brings a change in heart,
Or a change in mind.
He is here.
Where is his heart today?
I do care, I believe.
Waiting for age; how I desire it's thrills.
Leaving this moment I know I'll soon seek to touch once more,
I walk around with eyes strictly peripheral.
photo cred.
Captivated by the melody and accompanied by the memory.
"You don't need to look at the floor."
With my traveler's lid.
With my dirty boots.
With the chill of the air.
Still unsure.
Confidently insecure.
Wondering if the turning of the leaves brings a change in heart,
Or a change in mind.
He is here.
Where is his heart today?
I do care, I believe.
Waiting for age; how I desire it's thrills.
Leaving this moment I know I'll soon seek to touch once more,
I walk around with eyes strictly peripheral.
photo cred.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Thoughts at 1:20am
1.) The contents of my fridge: Milk. Water.
2.) To remember not to tell your new boyfriend while making out: "Oh don't worry my last boyfriend couldn't get it undone either..."
3.) Two cups of coffee & peanut butter M&M's tonight equals no sugar tomorrow. DETOX BITCH.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Moving Out is a lot like Dying
Here I am, night before moving in at college. I haven't even tried to go to bed yet, but I'm pretty sure it wouldn't work out too well. Especially considering I've had trouble sleeping due to college related anxiety for the past couple months. Actually probably longer than that.
All of this packing up everything you own and preparing to leave, saying goodbye to everyone you know... It feels a lot like you are about to die. It's scary. You are excited and nervous at the same time. You aren't sure if maybe you are really dreaming and the last few months never happened. But they did. Lord, they sure did. You had your summer of fun. Ugh, that reminds me summer is officially over tomorrow. It sucks. This summer has been undoubtedly the best time of my life. You realize life is purely choices now. You don't have to be in class at 8am like you were for the last 13 years. Summer after graduating high school is such an ecstasy it's so hard to explain. You want it to last forever because you feel so free. But then you are excited because everyone tells you college will be the best time of your life. So many emotions.
My last night at home. After tonight I don't live here really. My stuff is in boxes and bags and this room feels so empty. Well tomorrow I will have lotsss to talk about.... I'm guessing.
All of this packing up everything you own and preparing to leave, saying goodbye to everyone you know... It feels a lot like you are about to die. It's scary. You are excited and nervous at the same time. You aren't sure if maybe you are really dreaming and the last few months never happened. But they did. Lord, they sure did. You had your summer of fun. Ugh, that reminds me summer is officially over tomorrow. It sucks. This summer has been undoubtedly the best time of my life. You realize life is purely choices now. You don't have to be in class at 8am like you were for the last 13 years. Summer after graduating high school is such an ecstasy it's so hard to explain. You want it to last forever because you feel so free. But then you are excited because everyone tells you college will be the best time of your life. So many emotions.
My last night at home. After tonight I don't live here really. My stuff is in boxes and bags and this room feels so empty. Well tomorrow I will have lotsss to talk about.... I'm guessing.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
The Final Countdown
Only two days left until I move into the dorms. TWO! So naturally tomorrow is party night. The last party of my Summer 2009. While I'm anxious to get the year started at college, I'm also pretty sad about leaving all my friends and (ex?) boyfriend... (we halfway made up... whyyy am I partying at his place tomorrow night? Blame it on the a-a-a-alcohol. And his sweet talking).
My room is only about 20% ready for me to abandon it. When you've enjoyed your summer after high school as much as I have, it's hard to think you can leave it all and start a new chapter. I know it will happen, it's just hard to wrap your brain around. I'm sure somebody knows what I'm talking about. It's like a battle. "I'm readyy" then "why is this ending?".
photo cred. Love this pic? Check out her blog.
My room is only about 20% ready for me to abandon it. When you've enjoyed your summer after high school as much as I have, it's hard to think you can leave it all and start a new chapter. I know it will happen, it's just hard to wrap your brain around. I'm sure somebody knows what I'm talking about. It's like a battle. "I'm readyy" then "why is this ending?".
photo cred. Love this pic? Check out her blog.
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